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Holidays on Ice

2009-01-12T15:13:00.000-08:00

This week, I started reading a new book, also by David Sedaris, called "Holidays on Ice." The essays in this book revolve around the comical holiday experiences of David Sedaris. The first essay, "Santaland Diaries," is about Sedaris's job as a Macy's elf. Sedaris applies for several unsatisfying and low-pay jobs, such as a U.P.S truck driver and of course, a position as a Macy's elf. Sedaris, who is 33 at the time, obtains the elf position despite failing the drug test. Sedaris describes several hilarious instances while working at Macy's, like the time when he saw a mother instruct her son to urinate on an artificial mound of snow. This essay provides a great example of why you should get a thorough and legitimate education, so you don't end up being a 33 year old elf at Macy's.

Me Talk Pretty One Day.

2009-01-06T17:28:00.000-08:00

This week, I finished reading "Me Talk Pretty One Day" by David Sedaris. One particularly amusing essay in the last 40 pages of the book was titled "Picka Pocketoni." This essay is mainly about the stereotypes of the typical American against the different cultures of the world. Sedaris is on a Paris subway with his boyfriend when a middle-aged American couple get on the subway. The American man rudely declares Sedaris as a "ripe froggy." The couple, however, does not know that Sedaris speaks English, so they keep shouting rude and stereotypical remarks against French culture. The American man misunderstands a gesture from Sedaris and claims that Sedaris tried to pit-pocket him. Sedaris is quite amused by the whole scene, realizing how vulgar and stupid Americans are at times. As Sedaris walks off of the train, he seems to be quite upbeat about the American couple's remarks, considering himself to be a cunning "pit-pocket."

Me Talk Pretty One Day.

2009-01-01T15:14:00.000-08:00

This week I continued to read "Me Talk Pretty One Day." One particularly humorous essay in the book is about Sedaris's trip to France. Sedaris only knows a few vulgar French words at first, so he decides to enroll in French classes. The class that Sedaris takes is filled with people from many different cultures who have at least some French knowledge. The teacher continuously embarrasses and punishes Sedaris for his lack of knowledge and effort. Sedaris seems to think that his teacher would still hate him even if he had a full vocabulary of French words, but Sedaris's teacher only punishes Sedaris for his awful French speaking skills.

Me Talk Pretty One Day.

2008-12-15T18:35:00.000-08:00

This week, I continued to read "Me Talk Pretty One Day." Sedaris writes many hilarious essays that range from being about David's vile younger brother to criticizing the modern way of cooking. One particularly amusing essay by Sedaris was about Sedaris's personal assistant job. Sedaris becomes a personal assistant to a cheap foreign lady. This lady, who is quite well-off, owns a small publishing company that operates at the convenience of her own home. Sedaris envies her house and her leisurely life while working for her, but he soon becomes irritated with her wild and ridiculous demands. Sedaris quits his job and becomes an employee of a small moving company. The communist owner of the moving company treats Sedaris kindly, although he strikes Sedaris as the "cookoo" type. Sedaris humorously describes how he knows the type of people his employers are based on how they pack their items up.

Me Talk Pretty One Day.

2008-12-08T19:09:00.000-08:00

This week, I read the first two essays of David Sedaris's "Me Talk Pretty One Day." The first essay is about David's lisp as a child. David humorously describes the nature of his teacher and the activities done to correct his lisp. David seems ashamed of his lisp when it becomes eminent to David that he has a speech impediment. Once David learns that he cannot overcome his lisp, he simply avoids saying words with "s" sounds and learns synonym replacements of words with "s" sounds, thus increasing his vocabulary.

The second essay in "Me Talk Pretty One Day" is about David's guitar lessons. David's dad is a huge fan of jazz music, and he wants David and David's sisters to learn instruments. The father gets David a guitar and lessons to go along with it, but David tries to find excuses to skip guitar lessons. David feels slightly inferior from his guitar teacher, but soon becomes sympathetic to his teacher because he is taunted because of his height (he is very small).

Ethics Project

2008-12-06T13:51:00.000-08:00

Question: Should prisoners have the opportunity to be educated while serving their time?

Source 1: Garman, John. "Higher Education for Prisoners Will Lower Rates for Taxpayers." Jan. 17, 2002 3. 6 Dec 2008 .

The article I found on findarticles.com was written by Dr. John Garman. Dr. Garman is the president of Vista Community College in Berkeley, California and a regular contributor to San Francisco Weekly and Clackmans Literary Review. Garman writes a wide variety of articles from book reviews to current world issues. The article is mainly about the positive affects of treating prisoners, and is mainly centered towards allowing prisoners to be educated while serving their time.

Source 2: Davis , Aaron . "Schwarzenegger budget slashes education, releases prisoners." Associated Press January 10, 2008 1. 6 Dec 2008 .mjjjj

This article was written Aaron C. Davis, a frequent writer for the Associated Press and the Washington Post. This article is about how California has to cut down on prisoner education and other forms of education because of a money shortage throughout the state.

Source 3: Frolander-Ulf, Monica. "Teaching in Prison." (2001) 1. 8 Dec 2008 http://sks.sirs.com/cgi-bin/hst-article-display?id=SMN0307H-0-2372&artno=0000138786&type=ART&shfilter=U&key=prisoner%20education&title=Teaching%20in%20Prison&res=Y&ren=N&gov=N&lnk=N&ic=Y.

This article was found on Sirs.com, an online database of articles. This article specifically came from the Monthly Review Press, and is about teaching prisoners to read, write, and giving them basic education. The article presents many strong opinions about the affects on prisoners' lives if they were to recieve basic eduacation while in prison.

Source 4: Granoff , Gillian . "Prison College Programs Unlock the Keys to Human Potential." (2005) 1. 8 Dec 2008 http://www.educationupdate.com/archives/2005/May/html/FEAT-BehindBars.html.

This article centered around prisoners recieving college degrees while in prison. Boston University, Harvard, Gerogtown, Bard College, and Wesleyan University are the 6 colleges that offer outstanding education programs for prisoners. Each college grants prisoners with degrees if they complete courses provided for them.

Source 5: Vacca , James . "Educated Prisoners are Less Likely to Return to Prison." December 2004 7. 8 Dec 2008 http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qa4111/is_200412/ai_n9466371.

"Educated Prisoners are Less Likely to Return to Prison" is an article written about the positive affects of educating prisoners. The idea of cost for the education is also presented, with rough estimates of the costs to provide free education to all prisoners.

Source 6: McCann, Sarah. "Program helps Arizona prisoners get ready for real life ." (2008) 1. 8 Dec 2008 http://features.csmonitor.com/innovation/2008/07/31/program-helps-arizona-prisoners-get-ready-for-real-life/.

This article is about prisons in Arizona that offer special programs to prisoners. The programs offer education and work to get prisoners ready for life after prison. The programs are designed to help inmates get jobs after prison and keep them from commiting more crimes.

Slapstick

2008-12-01T18:34:00.000-08:00

In pages 90-274 of Slapstick, the middle and elderly life of Daffodil Swain is explained by Vonnegut. Daffodil parts ways with his twin sister as she is forced to go to a mental facility, and Daffodil goes to college and medical school. Daffodil becomes a doctor, although not a good one, and then he begins to realize the loneliness of his fellow Americans. Daffodil decides to run for president, proposing that Americans get assigned middle names. About 200 random people in all of the U.S.A. will be assigned the same middle name, making them a "family" of unrelated relatives. Somewhere in the mix, Daffodil becomes dependent on an unnecessary medication that is used to treat people with turrets syndrome. America soon falls apart when the Albanian Flu and the Green Death begin to take the lives of civilians. Daffodil officially loses his presidential office when America becomes a territory of madness and insanity, with "kings" ruling over large parts of the land. Daffodil goes to visit a women in Indiana who lets him use a device that lets people communicate with dead spirits. Daffodil talks to his sister, who tells him that he should die immediately so that Daffodil and his sister can unite again. After the conversation, Daffodil moves to New York, the island of Green Death, and the final resting place for Daffodil.

Slapstick

2008-11-25T19:58:00.000-08:00

In pages 60-90 of "Slapstick," Vonnegut mainly continues to describe the childhood of Daffodil Swain. Vonnegut says that Daffodil and his twin sister are like two humans of the same mind, and cannot perform when split apart from one another. Daffodil and his sister realize that their parents are under a lot of stress because they think that Daffodil and his sister are mentally challenged, which they are not. Daffodil and his sister begin to act like normal human beings in front of their parents and friends, but the reactions expressed by their parents and friends are mainly shocked, rather than the sudden initial happiness that was expected. Daffodil and his sister are confused as to why their parents are still under stress and unhappy about their children, even though Daffodil and his sister begin to act like their intelligent selves, which is what they thought would please their parents, rather than increase their confusion and stress.

Slapstick

2008-11-18T17:20:00.000-08:00

In pages 30-60, Vonnegut mainly writes about the childhood of Daffodil Swain, the main character. Swain and his identical twin sister were born with an odd set of features, such as abnormally large heads and six toes and fingers. People didn't believe that the twins would live past sixteen, but they actually turned out to be very intelligent humans. Daffodil and his sister would act like they were mentally challenged in front of people for humor, but in private, they would read books and self-educate themselves. People finally discovered that the Swain twins were actually quite brilliant when the twins were caught reading sophisticated books in the family library.

In the opening sentence of chapter 6, Vonnegut writes: "Perhaps some people are really born unhappy." I think that this sentence relates to both the book and Vonnegut's life. In the prologue, Vonnegut's childhood is often described as "sad" or "unhappy." This is interesting because Vonnegut also stated that "Slapstick" was the closest thing he would write to a biography of his life. I think this quote shows a lot about Daffodil Swain's depressed character in "Slapstick," and also that Vonnegut is not naturally a happy person in his life.

Slapstick

2008-11-11T16:17:00.001-08:00

The novel that I have chosen to read for this quarter is "Slapstick," by Kurt Vonnegut. The prologue, which occupies the first 21 pages of "Slapstick," is mainly about how Vonnegut came to writing "Slapstick." Vonnegut explains, in the prologue, that he began writing the book on a plane going to his aunt's funeral. Vonnegut also goes off on many tangents about his childhood and life as a writer in the prologue. The actual novel begins on page 23, with the introduction of the main character, Dr. Wilbur Daffodil-11 Swain. Swain, commonly referred to as, "Daffodil," was the last and tallest president of the United States of America. Daffodil resides with his daughter (Melody) and daughter's lover (Isadore) in the overgrown jungle which used to be Manhattan. The book is set sometime in the distant future when a disease known as "the green death" brakes out, and the whole island of Manhattan must be quarantined from the rest of the United States. Daffodil has the whole Empire State Building to himself, Melody, and Isadore; with their nearest neighbor, Vera (a slave owner), living 1.5 kilometers away. Vonnegut writes in a humorous and jolly style, often writing "Hi ho" after many outrageous and amusing paragraphs. So far, "Slapstick" seems to be a peculiar and entertaining novel with a twisted plot.

Not Really an Alaskan Mountain Man

2008-10-28T15:03:00.001-07:00

Doug Fine's "Not Really an Alaskan Mountain Man" is yet another experiment of Doug Fine, this time seeing if he (Doug), a city dweller, can live like a true outdoors-man in southern Alaska. In the first 30 pages of the book, Doug moves into a small cabin along Fritz Creek with his dog. Doug finds out that his neighbors consider him to be a Cheechako: an impersonator of a true Alaskan, a con. Doug makes it his goal to be considered a "true Alaskan", but for a city dweller who has never fired up a chain-saw, Doug has a long way to go before he can be called a "true Alaskan." Doug's first step to rid himself of the name Cheechako is to properly heat and insulate his house, but the only source of heat Doug can use is a fireplace. This means that if Doug wants to be reasonably warm, he has to chop down a tree, divide it into segments, and divide those segments into even smaller portions of wood, but for a New Yorker who is used to flicking a switch and becoming instantly toasty, all the work just to get some warmth seems like a stretch to Doug. Although Doug is already thinking about returning home to a more modern part of the U.S., Doug's determined soul keeps him going through the brutal winter, desiring to become a "true Alaskan."

The Greatest All-Time Baseball Record Book

2008-10-20T18:08:00.000-07:00

This week, I read the Greatest "All-Time Baseball Record Book" by Joseph L. Reichler. In this book, there are thousands of records, from the simplest of records, like most home runs, to the most awkward of records, like most double plays by a second baseman in a year. This book contains not only records, but pictures with captions as well. The book was published in 1981, so it is very interesting to see how outdated the records are. With all of these incredibly irrelevant records in the book, it makes you realize how much information is recorded and kept from each Major League Baseball game.

2008-10-13T16:14:00.000-07:00

The book "The Conscientious Marine Aquarist," by Robert Fenner is about how to maintain a healthy aquarium and about all types of saltwater fish. The book starts out by listing the necessary supplies to start a saltwater aquarium. As the book progresses, it begins to talk about many classifications of tropical saltwater fish that can survive in a suitable aquarium. Many pictures with captions are provided for the readers enjoyment. For each classification of fish (about 30 classifications given), Robert Fenner writes about the fish's general behavior, diet, illness, and which fish they can tolerate. "The Conscientious Marine Aquarist" lists each name of fish for every classification of fish, and whether they are or are not good choices for an aquarium. Also, there are many types of suitable coral and invertebrates listed that are suitable for an aquarium. The book is quite useful and helpful to the success of any beginning aquarist.

Adventure Magazine (October 2008)

2008-10-08T16:54:00.000-07:00

Instant Japan:

The article titled "Instant Japan" in "Adventure Magazine" is about the many different parts of Japan. The article talks about many places ranging from national parks of the north, to the warm tropical waters of the south of Japan. In Southern Japan, there are many places where the water visibility is nearly 100 feet in the warm, tropical waters. Okinawa is a popular spot for diving in Japan, where you can see hammerhead sharks and whales migrating. In the middle of Japan, there are many elaborate Buddhist temples where the magazine talks about the people and their Buddhist culture. Northern Japan has many national parks that are far from the booming city life of Tokyo. The magazine shows many places with lush vegetation and gaping waterfalls. Overall, I learned that Japan is a very interesting country with many different cultures, climates, and ecosystems.

Farewell My Subaru. (pgs. 101-150)

2008-09-30T05:31:00.000-07:00

In pages 101-150 of Farewell My Subaru, Doug Fine continues his project of living a life free from fossil fuels. Doug purchases 4 large panels of solar energy cells, 2 of which go on his house, and the other two are put to use on an old windmill. The 2 solar energy cells on the top of his house supply Doug with all of the electricity that he needs, while the other 2 solar energy cells on an old windmill supply energy to pump water up from an underground well. The water from an underground well is pumped up to the top of a hill and stored in a large tank. From the tank, the water is then heated using a very small solar energy cell that heats the water to very high temperatures. This water is now used by Doug for showers, tap water, and irrigation water. By this time in Doug's project, his vegetable garden is now fully grown. Doug begins to only eat what he has grown and the milk that his goats supply him with. Doug decides that he needs more protein in his diet, so he builds a chicken coup and purchases a few hens, which lay enough eggs for him and his neighbors. The book ends with Doug's success of living a "green" life, not using any commercially processed products or using fossil fuels. Instead of being just a project anymore, Doug liked his new lifestyle so much, that he still lives on his New Mexican ranch while living a "green" life.

Farewell My Subaru. (pgs. 50-100)

2008-09-23T15:43:00.000-07:00

In pages 50-100 of Doug Fine's Farewell My Subaru, Doug's project takes a dive when one of his goats gets sick. Doug is forced to make a decision for the sake of his goat that defeats the purpose of his project: purchase goat medication that must be shipped 2000 miles to get to his ranch in New Mexico. Although Doug disliked the amount of fossil fuels the shipment of the medication consumed, he appreciated the wellness that the medication brought to his goat. The next step Doug takes to living a "green" life is purchasing a special car that runs on vegetable oil. Doug drives to Albuquerque in his fossil fuel-consuming Subaru and trades it in at a dealership for a diesel engine Ford F-250 pickup. Doug's new pickup is then converted at a special car garage into a clean burning, veggie oil truck. When Doug gets back to his ranch, he searches for local fast food restaurants for used vegetable oil. A chinese takeout restaurant gladly gives Doug enough of their used vegetable oil to last Doug for many years. So far, Doug Fine's humane project is really turning out well, exceeding Doug's and many of Doug's close friends' expectations. In pages 50-100 of Farewell My Subaru, Doug Fine shows that any average Joe can live an independent life from fossil fuels.

Farewell My Subaru.

2008-09-18T16:41:00.000-07:00

In the non fiction "Farewell My Subaru," author Doug Fine writes about his experiment of living "green." Doug Fine plans to live independently from commercially produced food products and from fossil fuels. The book starts out with Doug Fine purchasing a 41 acre ranch in New Mexico. Doug's goal on his ranch is to be able to eat only what he grows and what his livestock produces for him. In the first few days, Doug plants his fruit and vegetable garden and finds himself making frequent trips to Wall-Mart for food. Until Doug's plants in his garden mature and produce fruits and vegetables, Doug must live off of commercially produced food. Doug's next action in living green is purchasing two baby goats from a Tucson, Arizona animal breeder. These two goats, when full grown, will provide much needed protein from their milk. Doug plans to make foods such as ice cream, cheese, and yogurt with the milk his goats will produce. Since Doug's ranch is in the heart of New Mexico, there are many predators that would love to feed on Doug's much needed goats, so Doug cleverly builds a sturdy pen for the goats that houses them at night. In the first 50 pages of Doug Fine's book, Doug finds that living green is harder than one may think, but he will soon become successful in his experiment to show that any city slicker can live a life independent from fossil fuels and commercially produced products.

Welcome

2008-09-15T11:44:00.001-07:00

Welcome to my English blog.